How To Quit The Habit Of Complaining? Find Out
All of us need to vent once in a while. However, being someone who is constantly complaining about everything and anything is annoying. On the other hand, complaining in strategic manner and in moderation can bring out the desired outcomes.
In matter of 3 weeks you can change yourself from someone who keeps complaining to a person who does it in moderation. Read on!
Week # 1:
Begin by figuring out how much you complain and also find out what tends to trigger your complaining nature.
Keep a rubber band on your wrist and switch it to the opposite arm each time you moan over something i.e. complain.
Note your mood
Note down every complaint you made, the person you expressed it to and also the mood before and after the complaint.
Read your complaining patterns
At weekends look at your list of complaints. Did you curse your neighbor when he played music too loud? Did you annoy your best friend while lamenting about your unhappy work life? You need to find out common themes so that you can get to the root of the problem.
Week # 2:
Choose your battle
It is said that there are two basic type of complaints. The first one is cathartic and will help you in getting something off your chest. The second one is instrumental. It helps you in finding a resolution. The goal is to make fewer cathartic complaints.
Sort out things
Separate the complaints from week one into two categories – ‘expressive’ and ‘instrumental’. Now rank the complaints in each category in the order of importance. This should be done to gain a better idea of which of your comments seems unimportant now.
Tally how many times you groan in day. That is, keep a track of your complaints. This would help in limiting those groans and you would rather bite your tongue when you open your mouth the next time.
Don’t complain at all
At the end of the week, try to prevent yourself from grouching for a complete 24 hours. If you really need to vent it out, please do so in a journal. Tell your near and dear ones to stop you when start lamenting about something to them.
Week # 3:
Ensure that you complaining is productive. When you complain effectively and get a great result, even if it is only a small thing, there is something really empowering about it.
Have a final goal in mind
Think of the ideal solution to the problem. If it is not possible for you to come up with one, you need to move on or find refuge in your journal.
Choose the person to whom you should complain
Speak with the right person, someone who can help in fixing your problem. For example, if you are unhappy with a product you just ordered, call the customer service desk instead of your husband or wife
Start practicing dialogue
Initially validate what the other person is feeling and then explain your problem politely. If you are frustrated about the fact that your husband never walks the dog, simply tell him, “I understand that it is tiring, however, it would be easier for me if you also shared this duty with me”.
Hope you found this post on how to stop complaining interesting!
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